Thoughts to Vogter2100, starting with spanking issue

(to Vogter2100, on Youtube) [I didn’t mean for this message to be like this; I was going to make this a short paragraph, but now? Sorry, I don’t know what got into me. If you never take the time to read this, I’m fine with that. I’d rather you focus your time on important things in life. But just in case you’re interested, here it is. And in case the whole world’s interested, I copied this onto my blog. For what it’s worth.] I entirely agree that spanking is never beneficial, only harmful. (it never prevented my sis & I from playing in the dangerous street; Mom showing us one dead, crushed skunk on the road, worked far more than all the beatings we got!) But there's one situation that has been stuck in my mind for awhile, ever since I read about the country of Latvia during the Soviet occupation. My step-father, Andrejs, escaped with what was left of his family just before the Germans drove the Soviets out. Among many of the traumas he suffered was hiding with others in a dark cellar for more than two weeks. Their lives depended on the silence of everyone. If a young child cried, screamed at the wrong time, they would have been exposed. All of the adults would have been imprisoned, many executed by the Soviet army. (he could never sleep in the dark because of that) Forcing a child to behave, every hour that he's awake, was necessary for the survival of everyone. Under those extreme circumstances, how much force is permissible? Is terrorizing a child justifiable if it seems like it's the only way they can all stay safe? If I had to do that to a child, I would resolve to undo whatever damage I was doing in any way possible. That includes holding, assuring my love for him/her as much as possible. If we survived, I'd make damn sure that a lot of playtime consisted of being very loud, with no self-restraint! I'm sorry, I lost the reason for this message. I was probably remembering when he'd spank us: a stern explanation before, then the belt on our butts, then a calm lecture, inviting us to tell him what we think/feel about our misdeed. If spanking was ever necessary, Andrejs knew the best way (he did it very rarely). My mother's way, with rage (& far more often) is the main reason imho, spanking's been outlawed. Andrejs, Atheist. My mom, fundy Christian, with the Bible's commandment to use the rod of discipline. To discipline a child, we need to remember it's not the same as punishment. A disciple is one who follows a certain way in life, careful not to stray from that way. Discipline (same root word) means encouraging a child to stay within a beneficial range of attitudes & behaviors, as well as discourage deviation from that way. Punishment, however, means to willfully make another being suffer. In a way, you made your 4 year old son suffer when you told him you don't ever want him to spit on anyone again, but no one can call that punishment. Without the turmoil associatred with spanking, you left plenty of room in his mind to want to be a better person. Out of LOVE for you, not fear. I've heard it said that Love is the opposite of Fear. There may be occasional exceptions to that statement, but not many. I am often reminded of how much my wife & daughter respect me. When they insult me, it's never insult, it's only joking & teasing. So when Kay gives me the middle finger, calls me Dumbass in response to my pranks on her- okay, it's not respectful I know, even when we both laugh. But it isn't disrespectful either, because she would never do that if she sensed that I had a problem with that kind of joking. Is there a difference between love and respect? I don't think there is. She behaves very well (mostly), not out of fear, but out of love and respect for both of us. I never tried to make Kay have respect me. All I ever wanted was to remove the causes of her misbehaviors, which included finding ways for her to love, respect herself. It still works great. In retrospect, using punishment would have made everything so much worse. And humor, by the way, works wonders. Once she was enraged at me for canceling her entire weekend, because of the way she mistreated her mom. When I realized her rage was also because of being embarrassed in front of her friends, I had to ask them if they also thought she looked beautiful when she's mad. Everyone burst into laughter. The change from hostility was instant & amazing. They had a nice night out instead of a wild weekend. That weekend turned out to be one of the best mother/daughter times ever! Life is strange, messy, frustrating and absolutely beautiful. So why did I choose to dump this on you? Yeah, it’s because of your series concerning spanking. But I think maybe there’s something else: If you had short hair & wore thick glasses, you would look so much like my step-dad! Your accent isn’t exactly Baltic, you’re more talkative than Andrejs ever was, but your humanist, atheist views, being as direct as you are… That’s my step dad! I guess in a strange way that’s why I wanted to dump all of this on you, because in many ways you remind me of him. Including the fact that you can’t spell worth shit ;-> Your friend and fellow hell-bound, soulless YouTube Atheist wanting a better world for all,Phoenix Knight

Just started.

I've got to overcome my block. Writer's block, artist block, I AM BLOCKED!!! That's all for now.