I need a coach, a trainer. I am Atrophe Incarnate. I cannot stand up because I've never taken a stand. Now, I can see. The first time in my life, I can see. The light is harsh, glaring, painful; The light is beautiful, amazing.... this sudden, uninvited enlightening is thrilling, agonizing, tragic, inspiring....
I'm not making sense, am I?
Life. I'm talking about LIFE!!!
I am awake for the first time. The shell I grew up in, the shell they built to keep knowledge out, ignorance in (based on biblical literalism, fundamentalism, satan's world against us, God's Chosen People) THAT shell broke, shattered in 2008. I didn't mean to break it. Shit, I didn't even know it was there! All I did was invite a piece of a fragment of some information derived from a fact. That's all it took.
I've tried standing on my own but I can't. I need rainers guided by a doctor that isn't sick & trapped in some other shell.
The religion, the cult sheltered me from LIFE my entire life. Now I'm free. But I'm not free. Because I cannot walk. Not yet. I will.
I need help getting started.   17May2012

I did NOT want to write about this

so I won't.

The entire room is spattered!

Is it possible to sneeze and vomit simultaneously? If so, think of the mess that would make!

2012 is The End Of The World! Yayyy!!!

May the new year see you happier than last year & the year before. You'd better be happy, cuz the whole world's gonna end this year. Yup! True! It's all predicted by the ancient Mayan civilization that, for mysterious reasons, weren't able to use their powers of prediction to avoid getting wiped out! Oh, waitaminute, It wasn't death & destruction they predicted- it's the many money/fame-grubbing charlatans that'd have you believe otherwise- their calendar only predicted that 2012 will be the end of an old 'cycle', and the start of a new. (Whatever a 'cycle' means.) The start of a new.... think about it.... That belief has no room for Doomsday if there's going to be a new 'anything', right? Right??? Think about it people! Before you join any cliff-jumping, poison-drinking group that wants to check out before the world's shit is supposedly gonna hit the fan. Curiosity probably didn't kill the cat, but it's ignorance that's killing the humans.

Got solutions! but only when I don't need them :-/

It is easy (almost) to think of something that can help me out of a depressive slump, out of an "emotional black hole." It's not that hard to come up with solutions and strategies- when I really don't need them! When I'm feeling fine & dandy, I can think of them! But when I really need to work my way out of those dark slumps, I usually can't figure out how!!!

Messed up, isn't it?

Be kind to those who carry you (idiot post)

Driving south on the way home from Tallahassee FL I saw something on the northbound lanes of the interstate that I thought was really cool. It was a huge multi-car accident less than 100 meters from the entrance to a cemetary. "Terry! Look at that!" I told my wife, "Whoever died in that wreck doesn't need to be carried far- the cemetary's right there! All they'd have to do is bring a shovel!" I don't know why, but Terry was offended ( '~') If you hafta die in a wreck, or from a heart attack, during a robbery or whatever, you really shoud check out next to a cemetary. Have polite consideration for those who're gonna carry you over there, you know? Unless you want to start up your own cemetary, be the first resident there. Work it out with the city beforehand.

Supernatural Designer is REAL!!!

Less than 5 years ago I discovered the science of Evolutionary Biology. Instead of an Intelligence existing beyond our universe having designed and created every single part pf every single organism on this planet, I was astounded to learn that all of life was most likely the product of the unguided forces of natural selection acting upon the variations produced by mutations, after the abiogenesis event. Although the theory itself never addresses the existence or intervention of a supernatural deity, it has become plain to me that such is not necessary to have produced everything we see in the natural world. Lately, I have been having second thoughts. There are some things that could only have been designed by a supernatural agent. The large intestines, for instance. In addition to providing the essential function of collating and removing waste and unnecessary material from the human body it also produces gaseous material that is discharged, often against the humans wishes, especially when said discharge will offend the olfactory senses of other humans in situations where said offences will have detrimental results. Worse, on some occasions the large intestines will involuntarily discharge its entire contents, with its associated gut-wrenching stench, while in the presence of other people, causing the human victim to desperately wish for immediate death. This is why I am entirely convinced of the large intestines having been designed by none other than Satan. -727Phoenix 22Nov2010